Everything exists of shadow and light, sometimes it’s vibrant and full of color, sometimes colors are fading away. It doesn’t say anything about the quality, it’s just how it goes. Some things stay in the light, other disappear in the shadow, maybe for a little while to appear again. It’s a play, a play of shadow and light.
Making visible what’s in my mind, at least trying to, is what I love. Here are a few watercolor sketches of emotions, thoughts and expressions. I don’t know where they come from and where they go, they pop up in my mind, just long enough to paint them. Then they make room for other images that keep me ‘busy’.
Reflection. This isn’t a self-portrait, and yet it is, this isn’t me and yet it is. I believe that in everything we create we put a lot of ourselves, and so it is with portraits. Maybe not always visible, it might be hidden behind the eyes. We all have many different faces, a child, a daughter, wife, mother, grandmother, artist, collector, lover of life, wanderer, dreamer, friend, perfectionist… Only to name a few. And all these faces expose, and sometimes hide, their own emotions, which makes us who we are, isn’t that intriguing! I love making portraits, wondering and trying to express what’s behind the face.
I have never been aware before how many faces there are. There are quantities of human beings, but there are many more faces, for each person has several. ~Rainer Maria Rilke
I am not that kind of person who writes a lot. I have lots of thoughts, feelings and ideas that I would love to write about. But I always feel as if there are not enough words to express my feelings and thoughts and then I am feeling blocked. When talking, I always use to many words, because I would like people to understand the things I want to say in the same level of detail I see it in my mind. As this is almost impossible, I feel helpless and awkward when it comes to words.
Still, I spend a lot of time musing and wandering about all the projects and inspiration in my head which need to come out in some way. I can not sit at my desk for hours and hours. I will paint for a little while, let it rest, and will get back to it later with a fresh look to finish it. Most of the time this happens through doodling on several pages at the same time. While painting I am surrounded with paper with watercolor splashes and doodles. When there is a more specific theme in my head I look through my stack of paper and start to work out one of them. That’s how it works for me.
Here is one of them, painted circles with leftover paint of my big watercolor brush before changing colors. I reuse this because it feels like waste to spill the paint. For the text shining through I used an app to create this double image.